1992′s Where Are They Now?

I started my X-Men fandom back in 1991 when my brother picked up Uncanny X-Men #275 (featuring my all-time favorite cover), and then had me buying them just three issues later.  1991 was a big year for the X-Men franchise, as the three big titles – Uncanny, New Mutants and X-Factor all went through major changes.  With the release of the cartoon shortly after, the X-Men became an even bigger sensation for young fans, even for a line that had for some time been THE book of the comic scene.

A lot of my time in late-91 and most of 1992 hanging out a small local comic shop about three blocks away from my house hanging out with the local solicitor, a guy I only knew as Steve.  Steve had opened a comic and card shop along with a small art gallery in a building next to Louisville’s Clifton Pizza, which is why to this day I associate the smell of a sit-down pizzeria with comics.  Steve was an amazing contributor to my fledgling comic fandom, one of the three people that _ my love of comics (along with my older brother and my friend’s Aunt Jane – who was my comic mentor).

I spent many a dollar in Steve’s shop, and he gave me numerous deals that helped me build my collection of both comics and cards.  For the entire summer of 1992, I spent dollar after dollar on packs of the first-ever X-Men trading card set.  This 100-card set (not counting the bonuses) was drawn completely by Jim Lee, and reflected all of the X-Teams, even Excalibur.  This card set let me learn about all the X-Men characters, in a time when Al Gore had yet to develop the Internet.  Back then, you had to read the issues yourself or find some kind of resource to get your knowledge.  And this one was mine.

At a dollar a pack, I spent most of the summer of ’92 piecing together this set.  Steve was nice enough to buy back my doubles as I slowly but surely worked on the entire set.  In fact, two weeks was spent looking for two cards to finish the set – Shatterstar and Danger Room Gambit – until one fateful day I bought one pack that had BOTH cards in it.  I was one happy camper.

In fact, my biggest regret of the numerous lost pieces of my youthful comic collection is that I managed to lose this set somewhere along the line.  It was probably pitched or given away by my mom, but I can’t really blame her as it likely took place during my down period of comic fandom in the early 00′s.  I could actually buy the whole set now for not that much, but I can’t say I have the money for it right now.  (If any reader would like to…just saying, ha!)

But I occasionally go back and look through the set, via a site of scans at comiccovers.com, and reminisce about the fun I had collecting them.

But today when I did so it dawned on me that there are some characters that were highlighted back in this boom period of X-Men that have been lost into character limbo over the years.  After all, it’s been over 2 decades since this set came out.  So let’s look at some of the featured characters from this period that have been largely forgotten over time.

186 Reasons Chris Claremont is Awesome #3: Charles Xavier’s Brand New Legs

So there was this one time that Professor X turned into a giant space bug and kind of died.  Funny thing, really.

Though largely an easily-defeated menace today, once upon a time, the Brood royally jacked the X-Men up, even infecting each one of them with a Queen embryo that would hatch and transform its host into a Brood, killing them in the process.  The thing even hatched in both Wolverine and Storm, but other factors (a healing factor and death) prevented the transformation.

Charles Xavier wasn’t so lucky.  His first attempt at detecting the thing knocked him into a catatonic stupor, then its influence led him to recruit the original New Mutants.  Seriously – go look it up.  Finally the X-Men, recently healed from their own infections, made it back to Earth and set out to cure their beloved mentor of his infection.

And they failed.

The Brood embryo hatched and Professor X’s body was irreversibly transformed.  Fortunately, the X-Men managed to put the kibosh on the thing before it overtook his mind, and before you can say “space age technology”, the Starjammers had a new Xavier body cloned and ready to go and transferred his mutant brain over.  The operation was a complete success, and the neat procedure had two neat little benefits.  One, it allowed creators to be able to keep Xavier “ageless” as his new body could be considered any age rather than being stuck with the real-world events of his origin.  The same was done with the recovery of Magneto, but that’s a story for another day.

The second and more in-story benefit was that the new body had a fully working set of legs, as the Starjammers didn’t find it necessary to smash his legs so the two would perfectly match.  So, with the X-Men and New Mutants watching with bated breaths, Professor X emerged from the medical site and shocked everyone by standing up from his chair for the first time since his Silver Age psychic braces had been abandoned because they were really stupid.

And then he screamed out in pain and crumpled into a heap.  Whoops.

You see, when Xavier initially had his legs smashed by Lucifer, he used his psychic powers as a mental painkiller to block the horrific pain.  As he continued over the years, he was always slightly doing such to keep himself sane and preventing his legs from having to be amputated.  With the debut of his new body, he finally was able to stop blocking the pain, but his powerful mind was not exactly registering his new limbs and thus still registered the massive pain when he tried to use them.

Think phantom pains, but in reverse.

So thus, Xavier’s fix was not a simple get-’em-and-go, but forced him into months of physical therapy to train his mind to once again use his legs, much like anyone going through rehab to relearn simple tasks upon recovering from injury.  It was a fantastic and unexpected move for the character, and is just one more reason why Chris Claremont is awesome.

186 Reasons Chris Claremont is Awesome #2: The Retirement of Banshee

When Chris Claremont took the relaunched X-Men team in issue #94, he immediately did house-cleaning.  Giant-Size X-Men had ended with Angel asking what are they going to do with 13 X-Men, and in just three pages that question was answered when six members quit (Sunfire, Angel, Havok, Polaris, Iceman and Marvel Girl).  By the end of the next issue, another was gone when Thunderbird got himself all blowed up.

On a tangent note, the question of having 13 X-Men is laughable for today’s fan, as Marvel would simply launch four more titles, add 13 more X-Men in, and only use five of them with any kind of regularity.  But I digress.

Claremont’s lineup kept Cyclops as the veteran leader, new characters Storm, Nightcrawler and Colossus as the out-of-their element rookies, Wolverine as the grizzled loner, and Banshee as the second-in-command, since he was not only a veteran in many different fields, but also a returning supporting character from the original book.

Though the distance from nose to mouth was greatly reduced.

And though I rarely hear anyone praising Banshee during this period, his story was one of the more interesting subplots (of the thousands Claremont would have running).  Unlike the others just beginning their careers as super-heroes, Banshee had been there and done that, not only as a hero (and villain, for that matter), but as an Interpol agent and NYPD cop.  And thus, the wear and tear of full-time heroics did not completely appeal to him, though a nod of convincing from Professor X would keep him going.

Though, if you think about what’s been revealed about Professor X in the past few years, maybe it was something of a mental push as well.

But it wasn’t just Banshee’s concerns of his age and weariness that was holding him back, but also a limitation to his body.  Unlike the other members of the team, Banshee found himself overtaxing his powers.  This was first demonstrated during the battle for the M’Krann Crystal when he found himself being overwhelmed by Crystal guardian Jahf, who he had to use as heavy a scream as he could, leaving his throat so raw he could barely speak.

Finally, in the X-Men’s trip to Japan, Banshee used his powers past all of his limits in keeping the villain Moses Magnum from sinking the island nation into the Pacific Ocean.  The move hospitalized him, and left him completely powerless.  His attempts to use his sonic scream in the next fight against Alpha Flight caused him so much pain, he passed out before Vindicator, shocking the Canuck.

The loss of powers might have caused Banshee to call it a day right there, except that the team’s return to the X-Mansion after months away found it completely shut down and locked up, and he had to help the team restore it, getting caught up in a battle against Arcade in Murderworld in which he again found himself more often than not a hindrance to the rest of the team, at least in his own mind.

Just after their return home, the team was called to Muir Island to take on Proteus, and Banshee found himself again taking a backseat role, this time even spending the majority of the fight in regular clothes rather than his costume.  Finally reunited with his love Moira MacTaggert and feeling his spot on the team was adequately filled by the rejoining of Phoenix, Banshee finally retired from the team to help run the Muir Island lab.

And that’s where Claremont kept him for over 100 issues.

But it’s not like he simply vanished.  Moira was still an important figure to the X-Men (and later New Mutants) and usually wherever she was, Banshee would be right next to her.  Though, as a point, Claremont made sure to keep him powerless, as the injuries to his throat would not be a quick fix like so many “serious” injuries found in comics.  Eventually Banshee’s sonic scream would return and he’d find himself back with the X-Men, but that is a story for another day.

But in having a character actually worry about their aging body, then be not only forced to retire but staying there for a long while is just another reason why Chris Claremont is awesome.

Dear Uncanny Avengers,

I can’t say I’m that inclined to give you the normal Dear John letter we associate with dropping a title, especially since I only gave you about three issues.  So let’s just say that it’s not you, it’s me.

Oh, not good enough for you?  Fine.

When Marvel announced the aftermath relaunch of the Avengers and X-Men lines (again), it felt like there would be a merging of sorts between the two, and I didn’t really like that at all.  After all, I’m an X-Men fan and I’m used to them being the red-headed step-children of the Marvel Universe.  That’s a part of their whole deal – “the world that fears and hates” them schtick.

So the whole AvX made the Avengers realize they had no idea what the X-Men had been doing and they mistrusted mutants, even the two they had who were supposed to show how beyond that they were.  And thus you were born, Uncanny Avengers, as a place to show mutants and human heroes working together – the bridge between the Avengers line and the X-Men line.

Except you aren’t really that, are you?  You see, you’re not enough of an X-Men book to keep me interested.  It’s basically a six-hero team, split half and half between Avengers and X-Men.  Except the three X-Men heroes you’ve picked are Havok, Wolverine and Rogue.  Havok hasn’t been a member of the X-Men team in years, and in fact he was off in character limbo for most of that time until Mike Carey got around to getting you back into the mainstream, only for you to head off to X-Factor (not that there was anything wrong with that).  But Havok, even as so-called leader of the team, doesn’t have an X-Men connection to keep everyone happy.  Which is a part of his selection – he was a government man and therefore trusted.  A figure head, if you will.  And that didn’t particularly interest me.

Of course, having Rogue was an interesting choice.  Besides the main core of characters, she is one of the best-known members of the X-Men line and has even had her own book for the past few years.  But really, I’m tired of Rogue.  I’ve been reading her book and I feel like I need a break from her.  Not a hooking point.

Then there was Wolverine who has largely become an Avengers character anyway, especially with him going anti-X for most of AvX.  So what if he was right?  He’s already stepped away from his own school now that Storm has taken over as headmistress and he follows the major heroes with the Avengers anyway.

And the Avengers part?  Captain America and Thor are appearing in Avengers, which thanks to my roommate Casey I’m keeping up with.  And Scarlet Witch?  Meh.

So you may be perfectly fine, but you just don’t have my interest enough to warrant dropping $4 all five times a month Marvel’s schedule puts you out.

So stay well and I wish you all the best.

-Jacob

Chuck Austen’s X-Men: The Draco, Part 2

And we’re back.  You might recall hellfire, fish beatings, magnetic lovings, sure.  Picking up where we left off:

Took Place In
Uncanny X-Men #432-434

Team Line-Up
Archangel (Leader), Havok (Leader?), Nightcrawler, Iceman(‘s head), Wolverine, Husk, Jubilee, Juggernaut, Northstar

Others You Should Be Aware Of
Polaris, Nurse Annie, Professor X, Sammy the Fish Boy, Carter Ghazikhanian

In a Nutshell
Azazel’s plan is launched, Alpha Flight attacks the Juggernaut, and the story collapses into a hole of suck.

So let’s finish this.

On Avengers vs. X-Men

I still see people loving it all over the place, but to me Avengers vs. X-Men is not a very enjoyable story.

Maybe it’s that I have to reference four different issues to try to find out how Wolverine is at his school to confront Cyclops in Wolverine and the X-Men #10 when a couple weeks earlier Captain America booted him into the Antarctic tundra and I don’t think Wolverine had time to head home before that.

Maybe it’s that between all of my books becoming fight scenes, I keep seeing the likes of Thing, Namor and Colossus while there are dozens of X-Men and Avengers that could be used in these sequences.

Perhaps it’s because the plot has become contrived in favor of getting all the pieces in the correct spot so you can have more fighting.  In a twelve issue series written by six writers working together, you’d think you could get more cohesion (or at least thought) into your plot.

I’ll go into details with the upcoming eXaminations.

X-Men in Video Games: Part 4

Let me tell you one thing, and I’m being completely honest.

X-Men, the 1992 arcade game, is incredible.  Despite what I may say in the rest of this post, the game is fucking incredible – and I try not to drop the f-bomb around here unless I’m really serious about something.  It’s my favorite X-Men game ever and I hope to one day own a copy of the 6-man cabinet.

There.  Now that we’re clear on that point – this game is a crazy hot load of mess.  But it’s the quirky kind of arcade mess that you likely never noticed in your youth, or simply didn’t care about.  Like where Shredder banished the Ninja Turtles into prehistoric times in Turtles in Time, yet still sent Foot Soldiers after them.

X-Men is an entire game of sending Foot Soldiers into the prehistoric past to defeat your enemies whom you’ve already defeated.

But let’s not dwell on the negative.  There’s a lot of positive to this game.’

Chuck Austen’s X-Men: The Draco, Part 1

Ah, the Draco.  This is the story you think of when you think “Chuck Austen’s X-Men”.  Now that Nightcrawler’s father has been revealed (via flashback), we now get to the story where Nightcrawler and his X-Men buddies interact with dear old dad.  This is good stuff, people.  And by good stuff, I mean bad.  Very, very bad.

Took Place In
Uncanny X-Men #429-431

Team Line-Up
Archangel (Leader), Havok (Leader, I think), Nightcrawler, Iceman, Wolverine, Husk, Jubilee, Juggernaut, Northstar

Others You Should Be Aware Of
Polaris, Nurse Annie, Professor X, Sammy the Fish Boy, Carter Ghazikhanian

In a Nutshell
Nightcrawler meets his maker (well, half of his maker, I guess), Juggernaut misses his goldfish and Polaris needs therapy.

Top 5

This month it is the top 5 movies with Marvel characters.  Yes, I might be overly specific, but saying just ‘Marvel movies’ could imply just those done by Marvel Studios.  So deal with it.

5.	Thor	I’m not sure what I was expecting when I sat down to watch this movie, but I enjoyed it so much that I have no problem with repeated viewings.  Director Kenneth Branagh (Gilderoy Lockhart in Harry Potter 2) did an excellent job in giving Asgard this other-worldly feel, while still making the scenes on Earth seem very real.  Chris Hemsworth’s acting made the movie.  He had the arrogant, over-confident demeanor you’d expect from Thor, but when the time came for Thor to humbled, he was also able to pull that off.
4.	Spider-man	There are probably many that would argue that the second movie is better, but I disagree.  There’s a reason written below the list.  The origin story was well done, and it was enjoyable watching Peter Parker discover his newfound abilities.  Willem Dafoe made a great Norman Osborn, and his descent into madness was well done.  Of course, Dafoe could be reading the phone book and his descent into madness would be obvious.  And just thinking about it now, it would be great to see an Avengers movie based on Dark Reign with him in it.
3.	X2:  X-Men United	For a while, Bryan Singer’s X-Men movies set the standard in how to make an excellent superhero movie, with X2 being the better of the two.  The acting and characterizations were spot on.  The team-up of the X-men with the Brotherhood was well done.  Singer was able to take these known villains, and team them up with the heroes while not losing any of their villainocity. This movie had me excited about what Singer would include in the third movie.  Unfortunately, it never came.
2.	Iron Man	The success of this movie is what allowed Marvel Studios to continue on its grand scheme to The Avengers movie.  How do you convince audiences to see a movie about one of the lesser known outside of comic book circles heroes?  Apparently by convincing an actor that needs to fix his image.  Robert Downey, Jr. was the perfect person to play the part of Tony Stark.  He was the real life version of Tony Stark.
1.	X-Men:  First Class	When I started thinking about this list, I really questioned if this should actually be at the top or not, and I started thinking about how much of a risk this movie took.  Think about the pitch for the movie.  It’s going to be a period piece about the X-Men, but it’s not going to have many recognizable or known characters in it, and even the ones that people do know the names of aren’t going to appear how most people know them.  And we also may piss of the hardcore fans because we are calling this movie “First Class,” but we’re only using one actual mutant that was there at the beginning.  But somehow, in the midst of all of that risk was an extraordinary movie that had great acting, great character moments, and enjoyable action sequences.

My next 5, otherwise know as honorable mentions, would go to X-Men, Captain America, Iron Man 2, Spider-man 2, and The Incredible Hulk.

The more I think about Spider-man 2, the less I like it.  It all has to do with the villain.  I generally don’t like sympathetic villains, and it takes a lot of work for me to accept them.  Take Two-Face for example.  Harvey Dent (The Dark Knight) tried to fight corruption in Gotham City, and when his girlfriend is threatened, he teeters on the verge of torture and threatens murder to get information.  He often toyed with chance with his double-sided coin.  But when his girlfriend dies and he is scarred, his belief in justice is changed to him believing that justice is all a matter of chance.  He still uses his coin, but since it has been marred also, it has two distinct sides, and he is no longer able to control the outcome.  In short, his quest for justice continues, but his view has been harmed.  Doctor Octopus is shown before the accident to be a nice scientist.  But after the accident, he begins a life of crime because he’s driven crazy because the robotic arms are talking to him.  Where the hell did that come from?  And then, when things look at their worst, he saves the day?  I don’t buy it.  And that is why Spider-man 2 isn’t very high on this list.

Versus – it’s not just an obscure sports channel

Were you worried that there wasn’t going to be enough action and fighting in the Avengers vs. X-Men 12-part series?  Well, worry no more.  Today, Marvel announced that there would be a 12-issue tie-in series titled AvX:  Versus.  Yes, spelled out that is Avengers versus X-men:  Versus.  Like the primary series, this series will also have a rotating team of writers and artists.  Two rotating teams per issue to be exact.  The first issue will have Magneto vs. Iron Man and be written by Jason Aaron and drawn by Adam Kubert.  It will also have Namor vs. Thing and be written by Katherine Immonen and drawn by Stuart Immonen.

I assume that this will also be a bi-weekly series, alternating weeks with the main series.  So, can Marvel maintain what will be a weekly book?  I’m doubtful, but maybe they’ll surprise me.  I was doubtful of DC’s ability to do a weekly series before 52, so there is always hope.  But, I’m still leery of having an Avengers vs. X-Men event, with a rotating group of creators.  What do you all think?