This month’s “Top 5” list is the top 5 things I would go back in time and change, relating to the world of comics, of course.
5. Don’t watch Elektra. Unlike lots of people, I really like the Daredevil movie, and so it is with that that I chose to view Elektra. This was before I really read any reviews, so I didn’t know what I was getting into. To be blunt, the movie is terrible. There’s a big climax that is supposed to have all kinds of tension, but it actually has zero tension to it. Spoiler alert, this kid that’s been hanging around Elektra dies, and she has to use the abilities she’s learned to bring him back. And it’s supposed to be emotional, but it’s not. It fails because if she fails, then she can just take the child to the person that brought her back to life in order to bring the kid back. But yes, the entire movie is terrible. It’s been too long since I’ve seen it to draw on any other specific examples.
4. Tell myself that I’m going to like reading stuff from some guy named Grant Morrison, and I should buy his stuff. Morrison is a writer that people either love or hate, and I love his writing. I’m just at a place now where I want to buy all of the trades of things I can get my hands on, and cost is hindering that. Namely, I want to get his JLA run, and the Seven Soldiers of Victory. Oh, and there is The Invisibles. Thankfully, I do have his entire run on Batman, and know a guy that I can borrow his X-Men stuff from, should I ever decide I want to re-read it.
3. Don’t play the Superman video game for the Nintendo 64. I can’t remember if this was a game we bought or if it was a gift, but either way we paid too much for it. The game is worse than what people say it is. It is incredibly frustrating, and possibly took years off of my life. The flying is terrible, and that is what is supposed to be fun about Superman. Most superheroes fight, but Superman has that added dimension of flight. The first Superman movie’s tagline was “You’ll believe a man can fly.” In this game, you will no longer believe that a man can fly, but rather that a man can awkwardly move about the sky without much control.
2. Don’t be so mad at Marvel. It’s no secret that I’m a DC fan. Most of what I bought as a kid, when I did buy comics was Batman and Superman stuff, but I read some old Marvel stuff as well. So, when I first started collecting again, it was possible that I could buy some Marvel titles if it weren’t for the fact that my three favorite characters in the Marvel Universe were all dead. Those characters are Colossus, Vision, and Hawkeye. Had these characters been alive, would I have bought titles that included them? Probably. As a side note, I did buy the first issue of the new Hawkeye ongoing, though I haven’t had a chance to read it, yet.
1. Don’t buy Countdown. If you’re familiar with Countdown, this is pretty obvious. If you’re not, then be thankful. Over the prior year, DC had launched their weekly series 52, which quickly failed what it was intended to do, but turned out to be a really good book. Four of your top writers doing what they wanted to with fairly minor characters. Well, DC decided to try that again, but mixed up the formula. They treated it as a television show with different writers, but someone (Paul Dini) guiding the overall story. Unlike 52, Countdown would tie into what was going on in the rest of the universe. Well, the first half did, because they quickly discovered that it was a pain to try to keep all of their titles on time to match up with Countdown. Add that they didn’t have good writers working on the issues, and you get a very uneven series that doesn’t really line up. And speaking of not lining up, midway through the series, the title was expanded to Countdown to Final Crisis. However, the joke was on us, because they didn’t bother to ensure that the end of the series would line up with the beginning of Final Crisis.