Saturday Morning Cartoons #54: Neogenic Nightmare, Part 12

neogenic 12.JPG

We pick up exactly where we last left off, with Spidey at the mercy of the super powered Tombstone. The room is filling with deadly gas, but Tombstone doesn’t need to breathe so he’s totally cool with that. Spidey only survives because Tombstone suddenly remembers that he came here to kidnap Dr. Curt Connors, who is currently trying to slink away. He lets Spider-Man go and throws Doc Connors into the back of his hearse, because of course Tombstone drives a goddamn hearse.


After escaping the dangers of the lab, Spider-Man suddenly remembers that he has a date with Alisa Silvermane. Having let his spider-shenanigans ruin his relationship with Mary Jane, he vows that he can’t screw this one up too and starts swinging toward the Coffee Bean for their scheduled meeting. He arrives just in time to see Alisa get kidnapped by Hammerhead and wonders just how in the hell she’s mixed up in all of this. We soon discover that Tombstone, working for Silvermane, has kidnapped Vanessa Fisk, the Kingpin’s wife. They plan to force him to give up the Tablet of Time in exchange for her. Hammerhead, having previously worked for Silvermane, knows about his daughter and kidnaps her to make things even again.


Inside Silvermane’s secret HQ, Dr. Connors discovers that he has built an exact replica of the top of the ancient Toletec pyramid in an attempt to harness the energy of the Tablet  of Time to make him young again.  Connors tells him he’s crazy, that we don’t know what the Tablet can actually do and that exposing himself to the energy of the Tablet could kill him. Silvermane tells Connors that he’ll be locked in the lab until he figures out how to make it work, which is totally how you do science.


Elsewhere, Spider-Man has his scheduled meeting with Smythe and the Mega-Slayer on top of the Empire State Building. Smythe seems surprised when Spidey tells him that somebody kidnapped Doc Connors, which surprises Spidey because he thought Kingpin was the one who kidnapped him. A fight ensues over Connors’ whereabouts but comes to an abrupt end when Kingpin tells Smythe that they don’t need Connors anymore because they’re giving up the Tablet in exchange for his wife. Spidey lets Smythe fly off, but not before attaching a new super sticky spider trace to track him down later.


As you might expect, the exchange pretty quickly goes to hell in a handbasket. Kingpin tries to double cross everybody, naturally, and the whole things goes to shit. Kingpin gets his wife back, but loses the Tablet, Connors, and Silvermane’s daughter. Hammerhead tries to kidnap Alisa again only for Spidey to save her, but she gets the drop on him with a stun gun because he doesn’t know that she’s secretly evil.


Alisa takes Spider-Man back to Silvermane’s HQ, holding him to be the first person that a rejuvenated Silvermane destroys. Not kills, because this is a kids’ show. Doc Connors has basically figured out how to use the Tablet to make things young again but when he insists that he needs more time for testing Silvermane refuses. Just as they’re about to begin, Smythe and his Mega-Slayer show up to ruin the fun. He’d found the spider tracer on his giant robot and reversed the homing frequency on it to find Spider-Man. He’s too late to stop Silvermane, though, who has become young again just like he wanted.

young silvermane

Well, maybe not just like he wanted…


Silvermane eventually regresses to the point of a screaming little baby, which is adorable. In the ensuing chaos, Doc Connors goes into Lizard mode again but gets changed back due to residual radiation from the Tablet & pyramid. He was hoping that the Tablet held the secret to curing his mutation problem, so is this permanent? Who knows? Alisa rigs the whole building to blow up and gets out with Tombstone and her baby daddy…no, that doesn’t sound right…father in baby form. Spider-Man gets out with Connors and his wife. Unbeknownst to them, Hammerhead manages to steal the Tablet itself before everything goes kablooey. He takes it to Kingpin, expecting a huge reward for retrieving it, but Fisk tells him to just get rid of it because the “sight of it sickens” him. Turns out, Kingpin’s wife has just left him. She’d come to realize that he cared far more about being the Kingpin of Crime than he cared about her, and this while Tablet controversy was the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back. We soon find out that Hammerhead has sold the Tablet to an evil looking shadowy figure, which is surely good news for Spidey & pals.



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